Topic: I chose to write about 6 Flags Over Texas obtaining an alcohol permit for its theme park and sister water park Hurricane Harbor.
How it impacts the community: This could be a positive or negative thing for the local community, depending upon how you view drinking at theme parks.
How it affects you personally: Personally, I enjoy going to theme parks as often as I can (which isn't that often), but I don't think drinking and roller coasters are a good mix.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Draft 2 Development...
Blog about how your rhetorical case study has developed from the previous drafts:
In this draft I changed up my intro paragraph a little bit, by adding how Phelps decision making skills has affected his whole life.
In the next paragraph I chose to keep the one about the night the event took place and the picture was taken, I felt this was important to keep because it would give background of the event. From here I chose to introduce how it has been affecting him as a professional swimmer both in and out of the pool, along with the consequences at hand.
Then I mention the DUI and how that affected him compared to this second legal trouble that he has had to deal with.
To add some pathos, I mention the story of myself and my little cousin watching the Beijing Olympics and how being a role model requires responsabilties.
Next paragraph I bring up the question of why Phelps hit the bong. I go into detail with quotes from Phelps concerning the public's questions and why, basically that it was a mistake that he regrets doing.
Overall I felt this draft was much better and had more analysis than the first, although I feel that more anaysis could be done. Hopefully I can wrap it up into a good paper.
In this draft I changed up my intro paragraph a little bit, by adding how Phelps decision making skills has affected his whole life.
In the next paragraph I chose to keep the one about the night the event took place and the picture was taken, I felt this was important to keep because it would give background of the event. From here I chose to introduce how it has been affecting him as a professional swimmer both in and out of the pool, along with the consequences at hand.
Then I mention the DUI and how that affected him compared to this second legal trouble that he has had to deal with.
To add some pathos, I mention the story of myself and my little cousin watching the Beijing Olympics and how being a role model requires responsabilties.
Next paragraph I bring up the question of why Phelps hit the bong. I go into detail with quotes from Phelps concerning the public's questions and why, basically that it was a mistake that he regrets doing.
Overall I felt this draft was much better and had more analysis than the first, although I feel that more anaysis could be done. Hopefully I can wrap it up into a good paper.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Phelps - Draft 1 - Author's Note
In this draft I feel that I have a better opening that applies to the rhetorical appeals. I try to compare how Phelp's life was before all of this media attack of his scandalus photograph. I think overall I know what I have to write and how I plan on writing it, its just difficult to put it into words sometimes. I also feel that the length needs to be longer. I hope this draft has a better overall rhetorical analysis and that it fits the requirements. -M.M.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Two Body Sections...
In my first body paragraph I try to appeal to the pathos, involving the family issues and how the controversy has begun to harm not only Phelps, but his family also. By doing this I will connect with the reader to apply the 'homey' feeling one gets when they too could have been involved in a related issue or have problems that affect the household. I choose to use strong quotes that back up Phelps reasoning and how he has been feeling these past few weeks during all this. I then mention Phelps feelings that he gets about swimming and how much he loves it, applying these feelings also to the pathos.
In the next body paragraph I chose to talk about the person who is trying to charge Michael Phelps. I use a few quotes from his opening to the public where he awnsered their questions. I feel that this gives the reader logos, by giving the reader 'evidence' that the Sheriff was trying to charge him with and why. I feel that these paragraphs might not have been rhetorical enough so I will mabye shorten them, keeping the rhetorical appealing parts and apply them at a different part in my paper.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Pre-writing for Rhetorical Paper...
1. What connects your sources?
a. They all revolve around the on-going story of Michael Phelps smoking out of a pipe that was released by a British Newspaper. Some give detailed information about the swimmer and what his family is going through. Others are blogs where people give their personal views on the situation and how it should/should not affect him in positive/negative ways. The blog is a fan based site, so it gives information from his supporters. Another source actually breaks down the events and how they have turned out. They start with the night it happened and then the processes Phelps has been going through to clear his name of this mistake. This is the story/idea that Phelps, as a national hero and 14-gold medalist, who was at the University of South Caroline partying when he decided to make a mistake that someone happened to take a picture of, then they released the picture for $100,000 to a British Newspaper who publicized the photograph, in turn causing the whole world to discover this shocking picture.
2. Order of the sources:
a. Fox News – gives the whole story; how it began and what occurred
b. NORML – gives a good view on Kellogg and their part of the story (dropping sponsorship)
c. SwimRoom.Com – gives Phelps personal blog; as well as peoples blogs and their reactions on Michaels situation
3. Why is this organization going to be effective:
a. It will provide the whole story from the start as not to mix up any details. Then the NORML will continue the argument why Kellogg Co. decided to drop him from sponsorship. Lastly, the swimroom.com will provide Michael’s personal statements about the situation, followed by his fan/supporters statements about his developing story.
4. How do you plan to transition between your sources?
a. From source 1 I will mention the situation as a whole. When the issue of his sponsors dropping him arrives, I will switch to source three. From there Ill mention source 3, this is Phelps’ national apology and his fans’ views on the blog site.
a. They all revolve around the on-going story of Michael Phelps smoking out of a pipe that was released by a British Newspaper. Some give detailed information about the swimmer and what his family is going through. Others are blogs where people give their personal views on the situation and how it should/should not affect him in positive/negative ways. The blog is a fan based site, so it gives information from his supporters. Another source actually breaks down the events and how they have turned out. They start with the night it happened and then the processes Phelps has been going through to clear his name of this mistake. This is the story/idea that Phelps, as a national hero and 14-gold medalist, who was at the University of South Caroline partying when he decided to make a mistake that someone happened to take a picture of, then they released the picture for $100,000 to a British Newspaper who publicized the photograph, in turn causing the whole world to discover this shocking picture.
2. Order of the sources:
a. Fox News – gives the whole story; how it began and what occurred
b. NORML – gives a good view on Kellogg and their part of the story (dropping sponsorship)
c. SwimRoom.Com – gives Phelps personal blog; as well as peoples blogs and their reactions on Michaels situation
3. Why is this organization going to be effective:
a. It will provide the whole story from the start as not to mix up any details. Then the NORML will continue the argument why Kellogg Co. decided to drop him from sponsorship. Lastly, the swimroom.com will provide Michael’s personal statements about the situation, followed by his fan/supporters statements about his developing story.
4. How do you plan to transition between your sources?
a. From source 1 I will mention the situation as a whole. When the issue of his sponsors dropping him arrives, I will switch to source three. From there Ill mention source 3, this is Phelps’ national apology and his fans’ views on the blog site.
How my perspective on this issue/topic has developed as I’ve been researching and analyzing my sources…
I've begun to develop an overall idea about my perspective on this issue/topic. I notice that as an American Hero, Phelps should not be banished. He holds more gold metals than any athlete in the world, shattering world records in the pool. He is a young adult, who made a mistake, but a costly one at that. He realized that what he chose to do that night at the party was wrong, and that it should never happen again by a world-wide apology given by himself at a press conference and online videos. It has effected Phelps and his family in a negative light, losing some of his sponsors and even his "right" to swim in US swimming meets for three months. I think his few mistakes (DUI, POM) have both taught him many valuable lessons that, hopefully, he will learn from. There are many articles saying this, but even after his DUI he promised no more mistakes like these, yet another appears a year (or less?) later. As an American citizen, I see his fault in allowing these pictures to be taken of him, but he is a youthful 23 year old who is only trying to live. Its also interesting to take notice of which of his sponsors stayed and which left him.
Research Experiences...
what did you discover during your research?
I discovered the Michael Phelps is banned from USA swimming for three months. I also found out that 8 people were arrested, and some charged, who were at the party where the picture of Phelps smoking was taken. So far he has not been charged with anything and it looks like they will not have proof of him actually smoking. He also publicly apologized to the US and all his sponsors, as well as the whole republic of China and its people. The person who took the picture sold it for $100,000 grand to a British Newspaper, who were the first to publicize the picture. The person who’s pipe (bong) it was in the picture is also being charged and/or arrested for trying to sell it online on EBay.
how do the sources cover your topic?
They cover the topic in general detail as not much information has been released. This is an on-going story that continues to develop almost every couple hours. It’s neat to not keep up with the story and check every few days to see how the story is developing.
what connections do you see among the sources and the way they approach the topic?
I noticed they all tend to use a positive outlook on Phelps. While some seem more realistic with their material, they still shed positive light on him. A lot of stories have personal quotes from Phelps himself, and the Sheriff who is “charging” Phelps. It’s interesting to read the information about the Sheriff and how he is seen as a negative factor in the story/how he is viewed as a person.
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